Life Isn't Fair

"Life isn't fair!" Have you ever heard a parent say this to their child in a store? Did you ever hear it when playing a game? Have you ever had to say this to your own children? No, me either ;) 

I am hoping this truth isn't getting lost, even though I am struggling with the reality of it right now. I mentioned in an earlier post that we have a child who has struggled with a chronic illness from a young age. At a crucial and difficult moment, our family doctor knocked it out of the park when he said "I bet you are pretty frustrated that you have to deal with this." The look on our child's face was pure sadness and surprise, almost a "How could you know that!" expression. He gave our child permission to feel grief about their situation. Our Doctor went on to say, "Life isn't fair, this is your deck of cards. Everyone gets a deck of cards, some people get cancer,or addiction, some people get diabetes. It isn't fair, this is just how it is." 

I was thankful, God knew our child needed to hear it from someone other than us. Our Doctor spoke those words with such compassion and care, at just the right moment, maybe not even knowing that he was an instrument of God's grace that day. 

The other day I read this quote from Viginia Satir~ Life is not what it's supposed to be. It's what it is. The way you cope with it is what makes the difference.

I was thinking about how I approach this as a follower of Christ. I am ashamed to say that it took me a while to wrap my head around the truth that God doesn't owe me the life I think I want or deserve. God doesn't show favoritism. The sun rises on those who follow him and on those who don't. The rain falls to nourish the crops of those who love and follow him and on the crops of those who don't.

In my last post I mentioned I have a rotator cuff injury that is preventing me from playing with my husband and kids the way we usually do during summer. I am sad because I feel like this is my last chance with our oldest who is graduated. I just don't know what next summer will look like. I feel like I have little time left with the boys and another summer on the sidelines is making me sad. But it's my 'deck of cards'. God really doesn't owe me anything. If I am not careful, my expectation of what I want or think I deserve will get in the way of what God wants to do at this time. I am trying to live out Romans 12:12 Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. I know you are surprised that I am struggling with this ;) I usually roll so effortlessly with the challenges life presents ( somehow the written word isn't quite catching the sarcasm that is enveloping my thoughts to the full extent, surprising!!)

My situation isn't nearly as challenging as my child's. I need to model my approach to affliction. I need to, not just for my child, but for my family and myself. Have joy in hope. Patience in Affliction. Faithfulness in prayer. 

Joy in hope. This restriction is not my eternity. I will get a new body that works exactly how it was intended to, "We grow weary in our present bodies, and we long to put on our heavenly bodies like new clothing." (2 Corinthians 5:2)

Patience in Affliction. Okay, this may be the hardest one for me. I like things working well, in order, efficiently. I have to remember that this will not always be my reality. My weak spot in having a good attitude will likely fall apart on this point. Patient endurance, not my favorite!! A day at a time is going to be my motto, rejoicing in small victories,

Faithful in prayer. The prayer isn't necessarily about my situation. How, in my current situation, do I stay on mission and pray that followers of Christ will be strengthened and the love God has for everyone be shared. My circumstance cannot eclipse the larger purpose. If I can keep this in perspective, my own frustration with my physical situation will be easier to keep under control.

Life will throw curve balls. I want to be able to look back and be certain that I behaved and acted in a way that honors God and others. I know I wont do this perfectly, but I want to do it to the best of my ability. This is my deck of cards and I want to cope with it in a way that models well for my children how to deal with disappointment.