I know for some the personal nature of a relationship with God sounds strange. That He speaks to those who follow Him and enters into conversation sounds ridiculous. Until it happens to you, there is no way to describe it or explain it. I don't know what to say. He speaks to me. He has had grace on me and lets me hear his voice and wants to do the same with you.
So then...back on topic!! God had been asking me to blog and for a long time I didn't take him seriously. I didn't read blogs, I didn't understand the concept. I didn't think anyone would really care about what I had to say. I wasn't sure I had anything to say. I just could not comprehend why God would ask me about this. Honestly, it did not make any sense at all.
I said nothing to anyone. I didn't even mention it to my husband. I kept pushing it off. So God started speaking louder and louder. He is so patient and relentless with me. I was so resistant, He finally had others speak to me. In a couple of weeks time random people, who knew nothing about this battle I was having with God, would walk up to me and talk to me about sharing my thoughts in a written form. One even mentioned blogging specifically. Unbelievable!!! What can I say, I am one stubborn girl. But, that finally got my attention.
A year ago, at Ladies Bible Study, God gave me something to share and let me know it was to be my first official post. I cannot even express the fear. It is a vulnerable thing posting your thoughts and reflections. I wonder and pray fervently each week what God is going to ask me to share.
Thank you. To those of you who read my posts, you are patient with my grammar, thought formation and all the mistakes I make. I struggle with the demon of perfectionism. In College and University, I would go over and over my work so I would get the grade I wanted. I was detailed and had the time to be so. The rules of writing do not come naturally to me and so a lot of editing is required. Currently, life does not allow me the time to review my writing as much as it needs. (Or as much as I would like) Yes, It clearly needs more editing than I am capable of and I am painfully aware of it. Yet, God will not let me stop. He is just telling me to get better at it. I know, right!?! Can you believe it!?! I thought that after a year of seeing how it went, He would agree with me, realize how inept I am and allow me to stop.
God has a great sense of humor.
Every time I have the thought that "this post will surely be my last!" He has a reader write me a private message or bump into me at a shop giving us a chance to talk about it. Or a reader will comment on the post and I am encouraged to continue. Every. Time! Not even kidding a little.
I have learned that every time God asks me to do something and I finally give in, I am surprised by how much I am blessed. He has helped me in so many ways this year as I have worked through the various posts. I have grown through this task.
Clearly, God has His reasons.
Who would ever think that a no name girl from a now where place would have her thoughts read in multiple Countries by such a variety of people. It is honestly mind blowing.
To those who take the time to read my posts, I appreciate your patience with me. Many of you have hung on in spite of my mistakes. I am completely humbled that you would take the time to read my thoughts. I am very relationally driven. I LOVE it when you share your responses. Messaging me with how you identify with what I write or struggle with it. Keep that up. It's my favorite!! I am glad for the adventure it has been and for the interactions with so many beautiful people. I am actually glad to continue the adventure. Who would have thought it! Thanks for sharing it with me.
For now, it looks like the journey will continue. I have no idea what is over the hill, but I guess that is where we are going...YIKES!!!
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