Conqueror

He is Risen!! The debt for our broken sinfulness is paid in full. New life is ours through our risen Savior.  He has conquered death!

Our church has a prayer time before the services start on Sunday. Today my throat was choked, tears threatened to spill. I am undone every Easter. It cuts me to the core. As a result, I even wrote an additional post "Scattered" on Good Friday to help me process.  Holy week walks us through all that Jesus endured when he paid the price for us. It is gruelling.

I saw many posts on my FB feed on Good Friday saying Sunday is coming. I was struck with the hurry we are in to move from the struggle to the hope. It is unbearable to face the cost of our sin and the fact that Jesus willingly paid it.  The price so profoundly huge, we do not want to stay in it. Immersing ourselves is too much. We want to quickly shake it off and move on to the hope.

I find that if I have not spent time during Lent and Holy Week preparing my heart and engaging in the path Jesus walked, the celebration on Easter Sunday is not as focused for me.  Joy is greater in contrast to struggle and despair.  Hope shines brighter when I take the time to reflect on it's cost.

We left Friday with Jesus entombed. A guard was placed because the Religious rulers did not want Jesus' body to be stolen. They knew the teachings, and they wanted to make sure no one took the body giving them the ability to claim a false resurrection.

Have you ever wondered what Jesus endured in between Friday and Sunday? What more did he go through that is absent from the recordings?  Is it too much to reveal to humanity? Would it crush us to know? 

The women gathered across from the grave and the disciples were scattered.  Judas, the betrayer of Christ, overcome with his sin returns the money and in despair ends his life. 

Friday ends with Jesus in the tomb and the Disciples scattered.

Nothing is recorded until Sunday morning. The women, Mary Magdalene and the other Mary, go to the tomb.

There is another earthquake. 

An Angel appearing like lightning rolls the stone away revealing an empty grave. The guards shake with fear and faint; they could lose their lives for this.

Some of the women run back to tell the Disciples who have gathered together.

In spite of the Religious leaders every effort, they could not keep Jesus in the grave. He rose victorious over death. Over the next while he appears to approximately 5oo witnesses. Documented appearances. No other book meets as many requirements for accurate literature as Scripture. This information is reliable. 

 

After he has met with the Disciples and others, Jesus is taken up to Heaven. His work on earth complete. 

The truth of the lengths God went to save me is overpowering.  I have been on the verge of tears all week.  God sent his Son as a baby, knowing we would beat him, mock him, kill him.  Jesus gave up his place with his Father, all the powers of his deity to become a man. He lived among us.  He fully identifies with us.  He gave himself up for us. God sent his only Son to hell and back for us. Jesus chose to go to hell and back for us.  What do we do with this? What is the proper response?

He did this out of great love for us.  He is alive. Jesus has risen. He offers us life eternal. People struggle with why Jesus is the only way to God.  He is the only way because he is the only one who made a way for us to be reconciled to God. He alone accomplished it. 

Jesus alone is the Victorious Conqueror.

Scattered

Easter is raw for me.The week leading up to Easter Sunday threatens to unglue me. The Cross is all I can think of at Christmas when we celebrate our Lords birth. I am always conscious that God gave his precious Son, knowing fully what would be demanded of him and what humanity would do to him. 

It is a discipline to enter into the narrative. It is emotionally jarring.

Holy Week starts with Jesus arriving in Bethany Saturday night. He shared a meal with his followers. The evening ends with Mary, the sister of Lazarus, anointing Jesus with perfume that would have cost enough to provide for her through her lifetime. Large crowds begin to gather.

On Sunday Jesus rides into Jerusalem on a donkey. Crowds cheer, worship and celebrate. It is a welcome worthy of a King. 

I keep thinking of how the disciples must have felt. It must have seemed like things were coming together. Something big was going to happen. All the years they had spent with Jesus, everything they had left behind, now what they had all been waiting for was just about to happen. 

Jesus weeps over Jerusalem.

Monday, Jesus enters the temple and explodes with disgust as he is confronted with the sinfulness of humanity, they dared to turn his Fathers house into a place for selfish gain and dishonesty. 

Jesus goes back to the temple on Tuesday and teaches. The Priests are so disturbed and angry they challenge his authority. Jesus replies with a question that stumps them. If they answer that his authority comes from Heaven they will be challenged for not believing. If they say his authority comes from human authority they risk angering the crowds. They play it safe and say they don't know. 

Again, I think of the disciples.  They must have felt satisfied with how Jesus managed the situation. It probably felt like he had the upper hand. Crowds gathered. The powers that be were nervous. It must have been so confusing. Externally everything looked great. Yet, in their time alone with Jesus, he kept telling confusing parables and trying to prepare them for his death. 

On Wednesday, Jesus teaches at the temple again. The religious leaders are so threatened and angry, they plot to kill him.

Thursday night he shares the Passover meal with his disciples, humbles himself by washing their feet and asking then to follow his example. Again he tries to prepare them for his death.  They do not understand. Despite his warnings, it seems they are riding the high of his popularity.

After dinner, they go to Gethsemane. Jesus asks them to pray, he goes off alone and enters an enormous Spiritual Battle. The intensity is so incredible that he sweats blood. 

His disciples sleep. 

They are not aware, they are not concerned. They do not seem to recognize his anguish and dismiss his call to prayer.

The next time he rises the disciples the religious leaders come with a guard, Judas betrays Jesus with a kiss and Jesus is arrested. 

For the disciples, I am sure it felt like they were on top of the world and then, with no warning, everything crashed and fell apart. 

The disciples scatter, Peter denies knowing Jesus. Jesus is falsely accused and a trial is held in secret at night before the Jewish leaders. He is mocked and beaten for sport "who hit you that time?" It is a long and painful night.

Friday morning they bring him beaten and bruised before Pilate, the local Roman authority. Again, he is falsely accused, Pilate recognizes this, he sends then to Herod hoping he will do the dirty work. Herod will have none of it and sends Jesus back to Pilate. Pilate tries to get the upper hand by giving the crowds a choice. They are permitted a prisoner to be freed. He finds the worst criminal he can and asks them who they want released, Jesus whose only wrong is that he claims to be the Messiah or this well-known felon who is vicious and cruel.

To his dismay, they ask for the criminal to released and call for Jesus to be crucified.

How fickle a crowd can be. Only a day ago they had gathered around Jesus to hear him teach. 

Where are the disciples? Only John is there with some of the women. What is going through their minds? 

Pilate washes his hands and declares that's the blood of Jesus is not on him. He hands Jesus over to the bloodthirsty crowd.

The soldiers dress him in a royal sash.

They spit on him.

They mock him.

Jesus endures 40 lashes, his flesh ripped to shreds, a crown of thorns piercing his head. He is then burdened with the cross beam that he will be crucified on and charged to carry it to the Place of the Skull where they will kill him.

The Journey is too much, Simon of Cyrene is recruited to do the heavy lifting and walks Jesus' last steps with him. A difficult task. I am sure Simone was forever changed by it.

Still, John is the only disciple amongst the crowd.

Jesus is nailed to the cross, brutally. An innocent man among thieves. A sign placed above him declaring him King of the Jews. Delighted by his suffering the religious leaders continue to mock him.

Jesus, whose love endures forever, prays for them "Forgive them Father, they do not know what they do.

For the first time, Jesus feels the weight of sin. All sin, from all of history and all time. Past, present and future.

He, who has never been apart from his Father is now separated from him. Cut off.

The physical pain, the emotional pain and the spiritual darkness Jesus faces are indescribable. Too difficult. 

At noon, darkness falls over the land. Jesus cries out asking his Father why he has been forsaken.

The darkness stays until three.

A final cry and Jesus' spirit departs.

The earth quaked.

Rocks split. 

The Centurian, who had likely crucified many people and never seen these displays declares, "Surely he was the Son of God."

The heavy veil, 4 inches thick that separated the Holy of Holies was torn in two announcing that we are no longer separate from God, through the blood of his precious son we have access to God himself. 

Joseph of Arimethea gets permission to gather Jesus' body. They place him in a tomb with guards to make sure no one snatches the body. 

This is how Good Friday ends.

Jesus dead, the disciples scattered.

Are you scattered? Disillusioned because what you thought was the plan turned out differently than you expected? What part of Holy Week do you find to bring up emotions, reflections or reactions?

No pain, no gain...

I am in the cranky part of rehabilitation with my shoulder. In order to achieve the last few degrees of mobility, I have to stretch further than they want to go, repeatedly. Three times a day. My recovering injuries don't like it. Consequently they get achy and I get cranky. "No pain, no gain" was coined in a rehab room, I am convinced of it.

I feel sorry for my family. I actually hid in the basement where I could do my exercises and avoid losing it on my children for being children. I was super uncomfortable and it wore me down. I was seeing red from plates on the counter rather than being put in the dishwasher. Not usually something that makes me want to lose my mind.

Do I feel like doing my exercises? No! Lately, my shoulder hurts from the exercises and makes me uncomfortable for the rest of the day. Plus, it can be discouraging when I used to lift weights that actually looked like weights and now, well, now I am lifting a very small, unimpressive bar and it exhausts my poor recovering injuries. Do I want limitations in my mobility for the rest of my life? No! No I don't! So which do I want more, comfort or mobility?

I think we all know the answer to that one.

I have been known to teach my kids that the best things come with hard work, discomfort and persistence. Sometimes we have to push through the discouragement, show some tenacity in order to reach our goal.

What was I thinking!!! Now I have to put action to my ideology. They are watching.

Are you missing out on something great because you want to avoid some discomfort?

Is there a goal you have but the road to achieve it looks hard and potentially painful?

This is where our mettle is tested. What are we made of? Are we willing to face the challenge?

Am I short sighted?

Can I see past the present to the rewards hard work and discomfort will grant me?

I haven't been able to do some of my favourite things for over a year. Others for 2 years because of the timing of my injuries.  How badly do I want to ski again, or water ski? Will I ever get to rock climb with my kids? Where do I want to be? What things do I want to be able to do?

Even though I know the answers, I don't always want to think about the potential rewards. But, those are the things I need to remember when I am achy and sore. Those are the thoughts I need to focus on when I would rather sit with the ice on my shoulder and avoid doing my exercises.

The progress I am making is slow, incremental really. A few degrees of movement every week. Essential degrees of movement. I need to think long term. I need to keep pushing. The goal isn't in sight, but I know it is coming!!

No pain, no gain...

What You See Is What You Get

We all know the age-old adage, "what you see is what you get". An apple is an apple, it doesn't transform into a steak because you are hungry for a steak. Or because you desperately hope it will become a steak. It is an apple. It won't change because you can see it's potential to be a steak.  It remains an apple. It is especially important to pay attention to this in dating.

One of the aspects of Craig's job that I love is the opportunity to connect with young adults. Often, they are running the gauntlet of the dating world. It can be an exciting but dangerous time.
We see many making wise, life-giving choices. We also see many walking a tightrope, risking more than just a broken heart. We try to love them. To watch them take these risks is one of the hardest parts of our line of work.

"What you see is what you get" is not how we start dating. We put our best foot forward. If we really like the person we subconsciously start to become what they are looking for. We may find ourselves going for long, romantic walks when on our own, we would never do that. If given a choice, that would not be how we would spend our time. It is important to be aware of this.

As time goes on, this best foot forward starts to fade and our real selves sneak out. This is when we need to be alert. This is when we need to guard ourselves against.

When dating, we need to look honestly at what is in front of us. If we want a partner for life who is active, we need to know they we living an active life before we met. Do I really like going for walks or am I just doing it because the one I love likes walks, will I still go for walks once we are married?

There are exceptions to this rule but they are few.  If you want a partner who loves God first, you need to see that they were and continue to actively prioritize God and practice the disciplines that lead to spiritual growth. This is an exception to the rule. Anyone who is actively seeking God is under the transforming power of the Holy Spirit. They are flexible and teachable. Those who spend time in the word and fight against their human nature do not stay the same. They grow in love, patience, humility, faithfulness and kindness. The evidence of this pursuit shows up in their behavior and choices. The fruit is demonstrated in their lives and as they consider you above themselves. This is one of the exceptions.

Time and time again I have seen people ignore the concerns that have arisen and ignored the wisdom of those who love them most. When marriage hasn't turned out as they hoped, they are confused. Their spouse has not become who they hoped they would become. They are lonely, disappointed and miserable.

If you find yourself caught in the cycle of remembering how they romanced you in the beginning or hoping that things will be different when you are married. You are lying to yourself.  You are at risk for talking yourself into a relationship you do not really want.  The issues cropping up while dating are always magnified in marriage.

What you see is what you are getting. Generally an apple is an apple.

If you are competing for their attention now, you  will compete when you are married. If they put their needs before yours now, they will when you get married. If they have a hot temper now, it will be there in marriage. Do not shove your concerns down. Do not talk yourself into believing it will get better. Do not talk yourself into hoping they will change.

This is who they are.

These are their priorities.

This will be your life.

What you see is what you get.

Is it what you want?

There are exceptions to this rule but they are few and people are good actors.  You need to be sure you are not just seeing what you want to see or being told what you want to hear. Look at their life, look at their behavior and choices. Seek the wisdom of those you trust and those who have made good decisions in this area.

How things are is how they will be...you need to be sure it is what you want.

How Do I Bring This Up Over Coffee?

"If he was willing to die for what he believed, why didn't he ever talk to me about it?" I heard this on an episode of Grey's Anatomy, it has haunted my thoughts since.

It caught me off guard.

It hit me deep.

I am guilty of this. I desperately want to have conversations with people about what they believe, questions they may have about God. I want to tell you of His mercy and grace to me and how a personal relationship with Him has transformed my life.

But, I am afraid.

• I don't want you to think I am like some of those crazy TV evangelists. Seriously, I worry about that!
• I don't want you to think I am only your friend so I can tell you about God. I am your friend because you are an amazing, fantastic person, and I feel grateful to know you.
• I think my husbands job and our work as Pastors are intimidating, and I do not want to make you uncomfortable.
• I don't want you to feel forced into a conversation that you do not wish to have.
• I am afraid if I start the conversation, it will scare you, and you will not want to be my friend.
• I don't know if you have been hurt by other people who were Christians, or had people try to shove their beliefs down your throat; I don't want to remind you of them, or be like that.

Honestly, it is very humbling to admit these fears out loud. I can talk with a stranger about God easier than I can with you, my friend. These excuses are weak. They sound silly to me as I type them out. Especially in light of the powerful work God has done. He deserves better from me, and you do too. My heart is bursting to talk about it with you over coffee, hear your ideas and yet, my mouth won't open up and say the words.

Can you believe I am a Pastor's wife? I am so horrible at this?!

I know right!?!

There have been times where precious friends have moved on to heaven, and I have been overwhelmed with the urge to come and share with you that you can be sure and have peace about what happens after we die. I want to tell you that even though life is hard, there is so much more than what the world has to offer.

I look for opportunities and then take the safe way out.

I have failed you.

I would love for you to ask me about God. That would be easier for me.

I am so weak!

Here is the thing, how will you have the chance to know if I won't speak? I need you to know your options. I need you to be able to explore, ask questions and make an informed choice.

So, here is what I am going to do.

I am going to be more bold. I am going to risk opening up conversations about God. I will not preach. I will listen. I will respect your boundaries.

Please know this, I care for you. Because I care, I desperately want to share with you why I love God so much. I want you to know why I willingly give my life for Him.

Can we talk?